Currently (or: trying for balance)

..Planning for our anniversary trip in a couple weeks. We’re going to Disney World! I’m excited (and you know Josh is excited). I haven’t been to Disney World since I was too young to appreciate the experience, so I’m looking forward to experiencing it as an adult. I’m a little nervous about the traveling and my health holding up, but I have faith that it’s all going to work out, and I think we’re going to have a blast.

..Feeling blue. Still. This morning, I had a long conversation with my dad about Mom – how she’s progressing, how he’s handling it, what the future might hold, how much this situation straight-up sucks. It was a tough conversation. As you can probably imagine, watching the love of his life slowly fade away to this disease is really tough on my dad. I get choked up all the time thinking about the whole situation, but especially when I try to imagine what my dad is going through. If you pray, please keep my dad in your prayers.

..Prioritizing fun! or at least, I’m trying to. There are a lot of sad and hard situations in my life right now. I’ve been seeing a counselor for about a month (oh hi, casual mention of a big detail, nice to see you here in the middle of this sentence) and she suggested that I start prioritizing light-hearted fun (in an attempt to bring some balance in my life). It feels strange, almost selfish.. I feel like I shouldn’t be seeking out “fun” when my parents are struggling, and my parents don’t have the option to ignore what’s happening, and my heart is heavy. But here’s the thing – the fact that I’m struggling with so much sadness is why I need to seek out fun. I need to create some kind of balance in my life. I’m hoping that our upcoming trip to Disney World will be a lot of fun and I can move forward with a lighter heart as I deal with heavy situations. But, I don’t know.. we’ll see how it goes.

..Thankful for my dad, hard but truthful conversations, that my mom is happy despite the dementia, flourless zucchini chocolate muffins (thanks to my Mom-in-law!), nap time snuggles with Josh, our newly-cleaned & organized garage (thanks, Josh!), wise counsel, having someone to talk to, and sleep.


What are you planning, feeling, prioritizing, and/or thankful for this week?

5 thoughts on “Currently (or: trying for balance)

  1. Hi Kelli!

    Actually, I’m also planning our Disney trip! Josh helped us book two additional nights (We were his FIRST customers!!!) and our trip is a month after yours. My mom and I have been planning a lot and we have an excel sheet with a schedule of what time our fast passes are, which park on which day, etc. On a more serious note, I’m praying for you and your mom and dad. My grandmother had Alzheimer’s for 10 years and she just passed away a couple of months ago. So I have some idea (not the same thing) of what you’re facing.

    Best wishes, Megan Bockelman 🙂 soccerkicker008@aol.com @Macattackgurl

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

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    • I feel super weird commenting after being just a reader for a while (I’ve been subscribed to your blog since I discovered Blimeycow), but I had to just let you know that my heart goes out to you and your parents during this time. I can’t imagine how hard it is, and you can be assured of my prayers. One thing I can definitely sympathize with is the difficulty of prioritizing lighthearted fun when so many heavy things are happening to you and those around you. The only way I have made a breakthrough with that is realizing that I am there for those people, but I won’t be strong for them if I don’t give myself a rest sometimes.

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  2. I am planning to start yoga, prioritize my whole lifestyle, and am thankful that this is my last year of high school. Oh also I am planning on spending a whole lot more time with God this week.

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  3. I think it is amazing you guys can afford to go on trips and be able to spend time together away from home as a couple. The only times we’ve been away has only been to stay with people we know and we barely put out any money outside of gas and I always feel badly about that, but we have a lot of kind friends who understand our financial issues. I’ve never been south of New Jersey (my state), west of PA, or North of Maine. I really admire when people can travel (thought I get a little jealous too).

    Don’t beat yourself up about going away though. Even though it is a difficult time for your family, I am sure your mom would want you to have time with Josh having fun while you are still young in your twenties and all. Every parent wants their child to experience fun things!

    planning: on going camping in a couple of weeks with our pastor’s family (in our own state)!
    feeling: Really good today, but sad the Olympics are over
    prioritizing: eating healthy and working out lately a bit more than ever
    thankful for this week: the sunshine

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