Currently, I’m..

Relieved
That all the initial consulatations with new doctors are over with. Meeting new doctors is so stressful! From now on when I go to the doctor, I will know who and what to expect, and that will really help my anxiety. The appointment with the surgeon this morning went as well as it could’ve: it was painful and nerve-wracking and it only further confirmed the bad news I’ve been expecting for months. However, I feel like I’ve struck gold twice this month because he was also one of the nicest doctors I’ve ever been to. It’s unbelievable how long I’ve been dealing with anxiety about doctors because I’d just never had a good relationship with one. Part of me feels gypped for missing out all these years. But mainly I’m incredibly grateful that the doctors I’ve come in contact with this time around are so good. Like, beyond my most hopeful dreams of what I wanted in a doctor.

Overwhelmed
Thanks so much to those of you who were praying for me and my appointment. I don’t know how to explain what it’s like to have so many of you caring about me and my life.. it’s humbling.

Waiting
Next steps (surgery date, medication, etc) will be decided next week! I’m just relieved that today’s appointment is done. I’ve been dreading it for months and months. I mean, I’m definitely not looking forward to surgery & recovery and I’m still kind of terrified of the pain it’s gonna cause. But it’s still a relief to be another step closer to getting better.

Feeling
Oh my goodness I am so tired. I didn’t get much sleep last night and didn’t take a nap today so I’m not sure why I’m still awake… I’m going to turn off my computer now and sleep for a long time.

Thankful for
very kind doctors • my hardworking, supportive, affectionate, and comforting husband • Thanksgiving tomorrow! • smoked turkey • green apples  • that Mia is feeling better • grace • inside jokes • puppy snuggles • a comfy bed

What are you relieved, overwhelmed, waiting, feeling, and/or thankful for this week?

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!